Love & Sex

​I am a love addict. At face value you might think that sounds attractive, but I have suffered greatly for my obsession. An obsession born out of being raised in a love-deprived vacuum of emotional neglect, verbal abuse, and physical assaults. An incessant hunger birthed out of… prolonged starvation. Who is to blame? 

​In addict-mode I have been a glutton for pain, a masochist for heart break. My body mind and soul has been raped pillaged and plundered since I was 12, and many times with my consent. Yeah… I said it… many times I consented… I admit. But I consented to be loved… I consented to make-love. Not to be sexed and left… not to be used, then abandoned… ravished and later despised! What happened?! Was it all a lie!? I consented to love… I did not consent to deception! There is a difference, is there not?

​Evil is cunning and its ways are deception, but The-Truth sets free!

What I have learned is: 

​Love is not made, so you can NOT “Make-love”. “Making-love” is a deceptive term used to manipulate the mind. Do not let this term manipulate you! Having sex with someone You-Do-Not-Love will not magically produce love in-you for-them. Having sex with someone who Does-Not-Love-You will not magically produce love in-them for-you. The act of sex alone is-not loving! Selah.

​Sex can NOT create love… so love is NOT produced by sexual activities.
Sex can NOT increase love… so love does NOT grow as a result of sexual acts.
Sex can NOT generate love… so love is NOT the effect of sexual performance.

​Sex was designed to be experienced within the boundaries of (1) A man and woman already in-love with each other and apart from having had any sexual experience with each other, and (2) a couple who have made a legally binding commitment of loyalty to each other for a lifetime. ​

In this context:

1. ​Sex is designed to Pro-Create, be fruitful and multiply;
2. Sex is designed to increase pleasure and reduce stress;
3. Sex is designed to be an expression of affection, appreciation, devotion and fun;
4. Sex is designed to solidify loyalty in order to fulfill the lifetime marriage vow and family obligations.

​All deviations from this God-Instituted Design is hurting humanity: mentally, physically, emotionally, sexually, romantically and spiritually!!!

Too many sexual encounters (sexual promiscuity) diminishes sexual satisfaction; diminished sexual satisfaction produces intrigue into sexually deviant behaviors; and embracing sexually deviant behaviors imprisons you and greatly limits your ability to find a naturally productive, healthy and fulfilling sex life and partner.

Sexually deviant behaviors include obsessive pornography, masturbation with objects, pedophilia, Bondage sex, painful/abusive sex, orgies, gang bangs, sex with animals, exhibitionist, etc. The sexual arousal behind all these sexual practices are complete deviations to what is naturally productive and healthy for a human sexual relationship. Sexual deviance is a bi-product of dysfunctional views of intimacy and unhealthy sexual experiences.

Relationship breakups hurt, but Relationship breakups that have experienced sexual intimacy can be traumatic to a person’s psyche, producing insecurities, trust-issues, low self-esteem, diminished self-worth; and it can callous individuals emotionally, making them lack empathy and remorse; all of which are serious road blocks to meaningful relationships in general. 

Sexual intimacy activates a soul-tie or subconscious bond designed to sustain hope for a lifetime partnership through better or worse. This is why people stay with an abusive partner for unreasonable amounts of time, and endure unreasonable amounts of abuses in the name of “love”. This sometimes blind and persevering hope is a natural result of sexual intimacy designed to help a marriage commitment last. It is the violation of this soul-tie/subconscious-bond that is the motivation behind “crimes of passion”. Never has there been a crime of passion where there was no sexual intimacy exchanged. Never. 

Bottom line is:

1. Sex is never a safe recreational activity no matter how responsible you think you are.
2. The effects of promiscuity is at the root of relationship barriers and conflicts that would have never been there if we never had sex with the wrong person. And
3. ​The wrong person to have sex with is anyone who does not love you already, and has not willingly bound their life with your life in a legal contract – aka: Marriage.